Gift certificates are not only a cold and thoughtless gift; they’re also one of the biggest shames being perpetrated by retailers today.
The sales pitch is, give them something they’re sure to like... gift certificates. The reality is gift certificates are an interest free loan you give to the retailer. Furthermore, you have to call in this loan within 12 months or they keep it. To cash it in, you have to purchase their marked-up goods having a sticker price equal to gift certificate or the retailer pockets the difference. The certificate holder’s gift choice usually comes just shy of the certificate value, so they’re enticed to fork out their own coin (the retailer’s other angle) on a crappy pair of socks they didn’t want or need just to use up the balance of the bloody certificate. This is standard policy at most stores. Even once at the AMC Theatre they tried to refuse my $10 certificate on a then $8 matinee, explaining they don’t give change. Their ploy didn’t work that time. I persuaded that little shite behind the Plexiglas to hand over the ticket and my $2 in change or else.
The sales pitch is, give them something they’re sure to like... gift certificates. The reality is gift certificates are an interest free loan you give to the retailer. Furthermore, you have to call in this loan within 12 months or they keep it. To cash it in, you have to purchase their marked-up goods having a sticker price equal to gift certificate or the retailer pockets the difference. The certificate holder’s gift choice usually comes just shy of the certificate value, so they’re enticed to fork out their own coin (the retailer’s other angle) on a crappy pair of socks they didn’t want or need just to use up the balance of the bloody certificate. This is standard policy at most stores. Even once at the AMC Theatre they tried to refuse my $10 certificate on a then $8 matinee, explaining they don’t give change. Their ploy didn’t work that time. I persuaded that little shite behind the Plexiglas to hand over the ticket and my $2 in change or else.
I’ve also had certificates refused for such ridiculous reasons as not being honoured at all locations, gone out of business and not applicable to movie premiers or products on sale. But after having advanced cash to these shysters in exchange for a promissory note, they treat you like a fekin’ beggar, all the while welcoming the wiser pay-as-you-go crowd.Gift certificates offer nothing - but headaches - for consumers and everything for the retailer. They should be called grifter certificates. It’s a sucker’s bet made for gullible gift givers too lazy or uncaring to put any thought and effort into their gifting.
If you care so little but still are compelled to give, smarten up and give cash. It's still accepted, at par and without conditions, in most places.
Have a hoot, it’s your loot
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